Vanishing Inwards: Exploring Not-Existence by Ria Shah

 

 

Typically in the mornings, as the beep of the microwave rings loud and black tea steams from my mug, I ponder over what I call not-existence. One might ask: Why revolve around the lack of existence instead of the current state of being inside it? In response, I strive to convey the satisfaction and gratification that I weave into the background of every situation I encounter, simply through feeling the reality of not-existence, the purposeful dwelling on the lack of being. A self, stripped of all decorations, is what we are left to tangibly poke and prod at. “Not-existence” is not an original concept of mine; it has thrived in the context of an identity that grew powerful from embracing its whole self and promoting others to do so.

When in The Book Alan Watts explains the taboo behind knowing who you are in the form of a book he wishes to hand down to his own children. “What, then, would be The Book which fathers might slip to their sons and mothers to their daughters without ever admitting it openly?” He begins his argument by indulging in awe: “Wonder, and its expression in poetry and the arts, are among the most important things which seem to distinguish men from other animals and intelligent and sensitive people from morons” (1). Yet in society, the arts are disregarded as the “less” successful, the “less” professional and mostly as the “less” meaningful. This is a pure example of the micro-layers we contain in ourselves—the surface being a mirror of what we want people to see while the truth remains hidden in a dark dungeon, never to see daylight—but it plays out on a larger scale called human civilization. We push our brothers, sisters, daughters and sons to suit their interests to a particular, already-created subject, when the real issue is whether or not society even has the capability, or “subjects” as we have labeled them, to withstand the potential every new human possesses. By explaining the importance of wonder, Watts pushes his readers to examine their own sense of wonder, secretly pushing them into a state of not-existence. The introspective nature of peeling back our layers of conformity is in essence what happens in the first few seconds of wondering about one’s true self. Yet Watts does not stop here—explaining the infinite characteristics of a single person’s life is the key to where not-existence truly manifests. Watts states, “This feeling of being lonely and very temporary visitors in the universe is in flat contradiction to everything known about man (and all other living organisms) in the sciences. We do not 'come into' this world; we come out of it, as leaves from a tree” (8).

Upon realizing that not only are we creatures born to wonder and constantly ask “Why?” but that we are also trapped in a single and unified flow of energy, one is compelled to isolate her self. Not-existence starts with cutting out all of the extremities surrounding our deep-most desires, feelings, beliefs and thought-processes—everything we are before we follow society’s rules and, as they say, “be polite.” It then directs the thinker to break the mold even further by contrasting a life without these core principles that we call the “self” among the tangible existence of the current life. This is a task hard to do without stepping outside the “life” and looking down as a bird would over a forest. For example, imagine that one feels one is, at the core, passionate about music but pursuing an education in business to appease the qualms associated with the “Arts.” This being would then go onto realize their true self by focusing on what life would consist of if their principle of “passion for music” was suddenly ripped from existence as a potential pass-time activity—how would you respond? This pattern of contrasting the in-existence of reality with our current state, where we push ourselves into that locked dark dungeon, is what creates an important responsibility, and most importantly, an awareness to follow our inner-most self. Through reading Watts I have found my method of not-existence most clearly explained: creating souls able to walk our planet in their own two shoes, not the ones society tries to force on our souls (pun intended).
 

Though Watts uses a book containing taboo information as a vehicle in which to deliver such thoughts to his reader, not-existence similarly lies at the base of Buddhist monk Matthieu Ricard’s enforcement of the power and necessity of altruism. His concept of altruism is best explained in his TED Talk, “The Habits of Happiness.” He has advocated human’s need to simply be a more altruistic society—before we grow too economically greedy and power corrupts even the most sensibly run governments.When a self practices meditating on the lack of having certain parts of themselves—even as far as material objects go (for example, being a part of a loving family)—that self inevitably plunges into protecting the deepest and most true pieces of their identity. My own self—which not-existence has helped to find yet still lies under piles of conformed statements and beliefs stolen from popular thought—has internalized new concepts that stem directly from the awareness that not-existence provides. Vedic secrets and the ancient South Asian Upanishad's underlying revelation about the duality of the self are a few of the many ancestral teachings I have been curious to look into, furthering my pursuit of not-existence and its effects. My actions can no more be impulsive; thought and “the self” are two variables placed into every calculation of whether or not to act or be still.

As a writer, I am in a constant drought of inspiration. The thirst is excruciatingly painful—not until I come across the right source of wonder am I able to fluidly write. If I do not actively hunt for the emotions and thoughts that constrict the back of my throat and swell my eye beds, then I am usually left staring blankly at an empty word document for hours, if not days. Yet the “not-existence formed self” is the one who comes out to bat when writing occurs for me in this way. If I am impulsively writing—that is, when my intentions lay somewhere other than exfoliating the raw nature of my beliefs, aspirations, thoughts and desires—then it no longer becomes my own writing but instead one tarnished by society’s residue.
 

It is not until we feel what existence would be like without our self, or even parts of our self, that we can truly understand the gift we are as human souls. Not-existence is no feat or secret ingredient to help one achieve massive wealth. It is rather a stumbled-upon term for characterizing the way in which my own identity cleanses itself. As the Bhagavad Gita puts it, "All things are unmanifested in their beginning, manifested in their medium stage and unmanifested in their end. What is there in this to grieve over?" Reverberations of this idea are already shaking the world; no one recipe exists to rip off that part of you that’s not actually you… but I sure do hope we can find it sooner than later.

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Works Cited
 

Watts, Alan. “Chapter 1: Inside Information.” The Book on the Taboo of Knowing Who You Are. 1-2. Print.

Big Little: A Turkish Muslim Writer Reflects on Malcolm X by Aliosman Kazdal

                                     

Constantly, the contemporary tend to compare themselves to what was, but rarely take time to see what still is and what always will be. The now will always have its differences with the old. What matters is understanding that people are people, and people have always been people for as long as people have been around. Generations are defined; baby boomers are compared to millennials, but only the differences are highlighted. Growing up, I have always liked a particular quote by Sir Isaac Newton, “If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.” To me, and many, this quote connects the generations. When I look at New York City, I think how wild it is that none of the original settlers of the island are alive today. It almost feels borrowed. Civilization itself can only exist if we pass on what we have made to those who follow. This is all merely the preface to the idea that not only do I live in the world created for me by the past, but I am no different than those people despite how different our worlds are. As Malcolm put it, we can both get angry, we can both sense injustice, and we can even follow the same faith (X).

Malik Shabazz, a/k/a/ Malcolm X, was born Malcolm Little on the 19^th of May in 1925. Little grew to be one of the most influential African-American orators in history. Like Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcolm X was a human rights activist, and just like MLK, Malcolm was shot in cold blood. My father was two years old when Malcolm X died in Harlem's Audobon Ballroom in 1965. The world I live in today is very different from the one Malcolm knew, but upon reading about his "The Ballot or the Bullet" speech, I began to relate to him. I had never learned about Malcolm X in school because all of the attention, when talking about the civil rights movement, was aimed towards King. This is understandable to a certain extent, for when I first learned about the black struggle for equality in America, I was in elementary school. No doubt it was easier for my teachers to praise an activist who was the bigger man against the bully rather than the man who put the bully’s teeth to the curb. Malcolm X wanted what King wanted, but in a much more intense as well as rational way. Malcolm wanted to bring Jim Crow before the United Nations; hence, he denounced the concept of civil disobedience, which he saw as begging the oppressor to be fair. Rather, Malcolm demanded justice. He was verbally articulate and aggressive towards white people and refused to believe it possible for people of all races to ever come together in a humane way. He joined the Nation of Islam, a religious movement founded in Detroit, Michigan. I was confused when reading about this point in his life, because he claimed to be a Muslim, but he was not talking like the Muslims I had grown up around. He called Islam the black man’s religion and saw Christianity as the white man's imposition upon black mankind. He used to preach that the white man was created by an evil scientist named Yakub. Upon reading this, I quickly dismissed the idea that this man could ever be a real Muslim, but the story was not over (Malcolm X and the Nation of Islam)---not by a long shot.

Part of being a Muslim is following five tenants, one of which is to take a haj, or a pilgrimage to the holy city of Mecca in Saudi Arabia. The Malcolm I mentioned before had not yet taken the haj. That did not occur until 1964. Like for so many Muslims, the haj is a life-changing experience, and Malcolm was no exception. Soon after, he began to speak like what I would call a real Muslim. At Mecca he saw the very thing he never thought possible: people of different races and skin tones and eye colors all praying together as Muslims.

I wanted to read more about Malcolm. Although I could not have guessed that I would have anything in common with him, I went through the same experience that he did. When I first read about him, I could not think it possible for this man to be a real Muslim in much the same way that he did not think it possible for the races to live together in peace. The moment he realized that it was possible---that proved me wrong also for I had the same experience, although on a significantly smaller scale. Little got bigger, and I also got bigger. This is what Newton means when he says that he looks from the shoulders of giants. Malcolm's experience made its way into my life, so in theory this experience that I am having can find its way to someone else’s life. If we keep sitting on the shoulders of giants who are also sitting on the shoulders of giants, one day mankind will be looking down from the stars.

 

We have always been people, but what changed us was ourselves throughout history. The job of the leading generation is to leave the world a better place than the one that we found. In the same fashion that we were brought up by those before us, we have to life those who are to come after. The New York City that was given to us will be theirs, and that is what humanity is. Malcolm gave me that experience.

   

Works Cited

"Malcolm X and the Nation of Islam." Ushistory.org. Independence Hall Association, n.d. Web. 07 Dec. 2015.

X
      Malcolm X and Alex Haley. The Autobiography of Malcolm X. New York: Ballantine, 1992. Print.

             



Is Feminism the New F Word? From Resistant to Responsive by Lola Solis

“That’s not lady like,” my grandma scolded me as I sat without crossing my legs at seven years old.

“Do you expect boys to respect you dressed like that?” my fifth grade teacher asked regarding my outfit of skirt and knee high socks.

“You’re showing too much skin,” my dad stated when at sixteen I wore a demure blouse to a birthday dinner. 

“You’re just asking for it with that dress,” I overheard a group of men saying as I walked into the bar on my eighteenth birthday.

 

These comments repeat themselves in my head like a broken record. As a young girl, I grew up hearing these statements so often it that became imprinted into my mind. Living in Allen, Texas, was like living in an inescapable bubble where my actions hardly ever went unnoticed, especially if they strayed from typical Texas conservatism. I remember walking into my high school office during my senior year to check in and receiving looks of absolute disgust at my brand new Rosie the Riveter tattoo from the Caucasian secretaries at the front desk. They looked at me like I was some animal, and I couldn’t help but laugh to myself at their dismay. Purposefully, I lifted up my dress past mid thigh so they could get a complete look at it. Horror struck their faces as I danced away. I made sure they knew I was proud to be a feminist. In spite of Rosie the Riveter being the heroic image of the 40’s that allowed women to work, the secretaries remain politicized by their own sex and unable to realize the historical importance of her being the transformational image of American iconography.

 

Some women can escape social conformity and become conscious of the incredibly sexist, patriarchal society we live in. Others are trapped and are incapable of realizing their true identity because they are the product of someone else’s identity formation. I fortunately have been able to remove myself from the worldwide view of women that objectifies and degrades us. Through years of breaking barriers that prevented me from formulating my own thoughts, identity, and beliefs, I’m able now to shape my own experience and to empower women as they have empowered me. Why is it that some women are able to see their political potential and others only see envy?

 

Ever since Betty Friedan’s Feminine Mystique used the identifiers feminist, feminism and feminists, these words have gained negative connotations. When I began to voice my opinions and argue back to conservative views that inherently put down women, I and many others who wished to combat the patriarchy obtained a sort of nickname; we were called the FemiNazis. I didn’t get tough by allowing a petty nickname to stop me from fighting for women, but the fact that people are comparing us to murderers who assisted in a genocide against Jews is unfathomable. Why are people so afraid of equality? Is this because we only earn roughly 75 cents to a dollar for doing the same job that a man does? Why so mute if not to suggest that silence equals acquiescence? Are they so reluctant to not see their enlightened self interest ought to have them representing equal pay as workers? I am haunted day and night by the resistance to delivering equal status for all. While women have been objectified for centuries, and men have always been the ones to issue power, I can somewhat understand the resistance to changing what some people may call normality. Just because it is tradition doesn’t make it just. For example, slavery was an American (peculiar) institution until 1865. I do not seek to diminish the road to freedom that African Americans were on, but sometimes I wonder about the American grain. Do we want women as property or do we want women as persons? I am sick and exhausted of this war against women and I will not stop until it is over.  Breaking social and economic gender barriers is not a job that can be accomplished overnight, nor can it be done alone.

 

I never really understood the power of voicing my opinions and standing up for my beliefs until this past year when old friends from high school contacted me to let me know how much I inspired them. One student wrote: “I respect you embracing how you are different from others from how you dress to your interests…I love that you are firm on your beliefs. I love how you strive really hard for the social equality of women as well as overall feminism. I love that you are trying so hard to make social change and make you voice be heard” (Small, par. 2).

 

Although one often hears about activists like Malcom X and Martin Luther King, Jr. and their leadership in civil rights, one never really believes that one has the power of doing the same. This is the mindset that is hindering society from moving towards gender equality. As smart and capable as I know I am to lead a movement, I need help from fellow individuals who experience the same passion and drive for justice as me. In “Letter from Birmingham Jail,” King states, “We know through painful experience that freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed” (Par. 11). By demanding that we break gender norms and fight back anti-feminist comments, we are following King’s nonviolent path to social change. What we need to bring to light is how absurd it is to be so terrified of our sex. Does a women scare us so much, that we feel as though we must do everything in our power to keep us from becoming equal to us? Like King asks his readers to imagine what we are supposed to tell our colored children about Jim Crow, I wonder what do American mothers tell their daughters. As Gloria Anzaldua puts it, do they tell them to tame their wild tongues? The tongue is to feminism as the non violent sit-in is to the Civil Right’s movement. 

 

Many men and women have claimed that my wild tongue is intimidating and “unattractive,” but underneath what they are saying is the acknowledgement that I can be articulate. I am strong, independent, and verbal about issues affecting women and I will never give in to intimidation by men and counterproductive strategies by women. If we want to destroy the walls that separate us, then we must stand strong and continue to bring to light the issues that have been pushed aside and ignored by politicians for decades. 

“We know how to survive. When other races have given up their tongue, we’ve kept ours. We know what it is to live under the hammer blow of the dominant norteamericano culture. But more than we count the blows, we count the days the weeks the years the centuries the eons until the white laws and commerce and customs will rot in the deserts they’ve created, lie bleached…Chicanos will walk by the crumbling ashes as we go about our business. Stubborn, preserving, impenetrable as stone, yet possessing a malleability that renders us unbreakable. We…will remain” (Anzaldua pg. 85)

 

 

Despite the various negative connotations of the word feminist, I will never stop identifying as one. Although it takes many hits, feminism is actually an indication of progress. In Susan Faludi’s Backlash: The Undeclared War Against American Women, she states, “In national surveys 75 to 95 percent of women credit the feminist campaign with improving their lives, and a similar proportion say that the women's movement should keep pushing for change” (Faludi Par. 23). If women are benefiting from the feminist movement, why stop?

 

Works Cited

 

Anzaldua, Gloria. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue.” Borderlands/La Frontera: The New Mestiza. 

Web. 28 March 2016.

"Letter from a Birmingham Jail [King, Jr.]." Letter from a Birmingham Jail [King, Jr.]. Web. 28

March 2016.

Small, Jennifer. Text message to author. 8 November 2016.

 

Mastering a Free-Thinking Perspective by Brittany Davis

 

It’s amazing to me how certain texts can generate profound reactions, inciting my thought and broadening my outlook. Whilst reading the works of Franz Kafka, Susan Faludi, Plato, and Walt Whitman, I became particularly introspective due to the relatability of the concepts and the artistry in which they were written. With Franz Kafka’s The Metamorphosis, I was forced to confront the magnitude in which I use my voice, and if my voice is considered a leading component of my character. Susan Faludi’s Backlash educated me on the struggles that adult women encounter, motivating me to denounce and reform the current structure in which women are marginalized. The symbolism behind Plato’s “Allegory of the Cave” demonstrated the obligation I have to be both free in my thinking and influential in my liberation. “Song of Myself,” written by Walt Whitman, contains an abundance of complexities, but, as he elegantly expresses, I am not alone in understanding the convoluted perplexities the world puts forth. Not only have these texts forced me to reflect on my identity, but they have also promoted me to further my advancement in both my attitudes and my judgments.

In Franz Kafka’s novella The Metamorphosis, the protagonist, Gregor, wishes to be rid of his mundane job and household responsibilities. To his surprise and his family’s, he wakes up one morning as a giant bug. Though his family tries to assist him in his new condition, they end up finding him to be a burden and want to be free of him. The novella ends with Gregor’s demise from depression and lack of care. Metamorphosis is grim not only because of Gregor’s unwelcomed transformation and consequentially his end, but also due to his immediate exclusion from society as a result of his noncompliance to societal norms.

 

Gregor is unable to speak, therefore suppressing his identity. He is unable to explain his actions and is therefore chastised for behaving in a manner that renounces norms because he is unable to justify such actions. Subjectively speaking, I have never been one to repudiate the status quo; however, I can relate to the protagonist’s conflict with speech. Unlike Gregor, I have the opportunity to communicate with others; however, my aversion to speech tends to put me in a position similar to Gregor’s. Great communicators can oftentimes undermine the voices of others. With this work, I was forced to ask myself if I am repressing my own identity by allowing those with more potent voices to assert their opinions over mine. Kafka also challenged me to observe how much of our identities come from the nature of speech. Those who may not have the capacity to sufficiently verbalize their thoughts may find an interest in writing; however, today we rarely communicate through writing and if we do, it is mostly through shorthand and Emojis. Although we can attempt to express ourselves through appearance, like Gregor, we are forever subjugated to the unwarranted disapprovals that are cast upon us. Through voice, one can learn, engage in compromise, and speak up for themselves and others. Kafka challenges me to use the voice I have to construct my own identity.

 

I don’t find that our nation’s gender gap is apparently distinct in my everyday life; however, the media, one of the greatest influences of my generation, is always prone to highlight gender disparities and even widen the gap for further self-interest. In Susan Faludi’s Backlash, she exposes the inequalities women face today, despite the many misconceptions people have made in believing that women have overcome all of their obstacles. Faludi concludes the debate by offering several instances in which females are deemed inferior to men, including government representation, occupational and domestic positions, our nation’s failure to accommodate for women’s reproductive rights, and the way we are portrayed in popular culture. Due to Faludi’s work, my stance on women’s rights expanded, because at my age, many of the divergences between genders are not necessarily conspicuous in my position. Through her outlook and research, I am able to better understand the challenges I might face if  adequate progress in the women’s rights movement is not made.

 

Faludi argues that female dilemmas derive from the media, calling it “an endless feedback loop that perpetuates and exaggerates its own false images of womanhood.” I find that it has been increasingly difficult to overlook the prevailing portrayals of women in the media. Through advertisements, women are repeatedly over-sexualized, and onscreen, in television and movies, they account only for 12% of the protagonists in 2014 programming. This depiction of women gives society the impression that women’s voices are less valuable compared to men’s, and their appearances are the foremost component of their identities. Women’s voices are also extremely underrepresented in the media. In 2014, women comprised merely 25% of writers, 23% of executive producers, and 20% of show creators (Alter). As expressed by Simone de Beauvoir, “Representation of the world, like the world itself, is the work of men; they describe it from their own point of view, which they confuse with absolute truth” (141). It is difficult to achieve genuine images of womanhood if men are the ones constructing female ideals. Faludi’s writing settled my position on women in media: the lack of female involvement in the media’s influential portrayals of women generates further insignificance for women’s central identities. In acknowledging this issue that women continually endure, I can aim to resolve the ongoing imbalances and false depictions, furthering the advancement of gender equality.  My identity as a woman should not be established by distorted ideals, and other women should not feel the need to alter themselves in order to match any corrupt standards. 

One of the concepts created by Plato is the Theory of Forms, which explains that in our reality there are true “forms” that we cannot necessarily observe with our five senses, but function as our reference point for everything, from beauty to goodness. Plato taught that humans are born with an understanding of the real forms, but as we grow, society alters those forms, obstructing us from being able to see the truth (“Plato’s Theory of Forms- What Does it Really Mean”). In the “Allegory of the Cave,” prisoners have been held inside a cave since birth, and while they are unable to see the world outside of the cave, they do observe the shadows that the world makes, accepting that to be reality. One prisoner frees himself from the false world presented to him, and by leaving the cave, the prisoner is attempting to unearth the true “forms.” The environment the prisoner discovers represents the World of Forms, and all elements in the world derive from the sun, which represents goodness. The World of Forms is believed to be where honest beauty exists. Plato’s work broadens my outlook on what is deemed beautiful. Society establishes standards of beauty and forces humanity to perceive them, through advertisements and media, although the ingrained standards are merely reflections of the true “forms.” Plato teaches that those who seek the genuine model of beauty will find that it derives from goodness.

 

As humans, our knowledge is limited to the civilization that we are born into, similar to the prisoners enduring the entirety of their lives in a cave. They perceive the world from solely their position inside the cave, observing inaccurate depictions and refusing to believe that they are being deceived. “The Allegory of the Cave” can also be resolved by understanding of what it means to be open-minded. As described by Alan Watts, “If we are open only to discoveries which will accord with what we know already, we may as well stay shut” (103). In order to interpret the world on a broader spectrum, I must learn to detach myself from what I was taught in order to justly perceive a world that is unlike the one I have come to know.

 

The best way to learn is through experience, according Walt Whitman. In his poem “Song of Myself,” he is not only commending himself, but also humanity in its entirety. According to Whitman, we are all connected as he illustrates through the nature of grass. Grass grows upon the deceased, connecting humanity to earth and individuals to all of humanity. Just as humans and nature are equal, Whitman considers body and soul to one as well. Whitman’s emphasis on the integrality that exists between humans and nature builds by notion that humanity should fixate on what we know, rather than what we hold to be true, as in religion. Whitman rejects prioritizing one God over others, because God is everywhere and we are all one collective world. I am inspired by his rejection of complete isolation, because regardless of the circumstance, one is never alone on his or her journey of existence. The difficulties in life are easier to conquer when an individual recognizes that they are not unaccompanied. Whitman declares, “And I say to any man or woman, Let your soul stand cool and composed before a million universes” (79). He is assuring readers that their identity is great and able to overcome any of the challenges that life presents.

 

It’s a beautiful concept that poetry, stories, and memoirs can forge one’s individuality. The publication and dissemination of history’s and today’s influential perspectives persuades the mindsets of several individuals, not only connecting people to the past, but also connecting people together here and now. People might not always think the same way as me either because their identities have been more or less developed, or because their identities have been established in a completely dissimilar system; however, this difference in identities is one of the grand advantages that humanity tends to overlook. Those who possess identities that have been forged by numerous experiences can influence and inspire those who have not or may never be able to undergo those experiences. The works that I read have guided my growth as an individual, and my interactions with others encourages me to continue to expand my own perspective.

Works Cited

Alter, Charlotte. "8 Sad Truths about Women in Media." Time. N.p., 5 June 2015. Web. 7 Dec. 2015. <http://time.com/3908138/women-in-media-sad-truths-report/>.

De Beauvoir, Simone. The Second Sex. N.p.: n.p., 1989. Print.

Faludi, Susan. "Blame It on Feminism." Introduction. Backlash: The Undeclared War against American Women. N.p.: n.p., n.d. N. pag. Print.

Kafka, Franz. The Metamorphosis. N.p.: n.p., 2009. Print.

Plato. "Book VII." The Republic. N.p.: n.p., n.d. N. pag. Print.

"Plato's Theory of Forms- What Does It Really Mean?" Philosophyzer. N.p., 8 Oct. 2012. Web. 7 Dec. 2015. <http://www.philosophyzer.com/platos-theory-of-forms/>.

Shmoop Editorial Team. "The Metamorphosis Summary." Shmoop. N.p., 11 Nov. 2008. Web. 7 Dec. 2015. <http://www.shmoop.com/metamorphosis/summary.html>.

TED- Ed. Plato’s Allegory of the Cave - Alex Gendler. Youtube. N.p., 17 Mar. 2015. Web. 7 Dec. 2015. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RWOpQXTltA>.

Vlach, Michael. "Plato's Theory of Forms." Theological Studies. N.p., 2012. Web. 7 Dec. 2015. <http://www.theologicalstudies.org/resource-library/philosophy-dictionary/158-platos-theory-of-forms>.

Watts, Alan. The Wisdom of Insecurity: A Message for an Age of Anxiety. N.p.: n.p., n.d. Print.

Whitman, Walt. "Song of Myself." Leaves of Grass. N.p.: n.p., n.d. N. pag. Print.



Bursting One's Bubble to Discover One's Identity by Raymond Chappan



It is not uncommon for a person to wander through life not knowing who they are. It drives people mad trying to find their identity. The most clichéd response one can say is, “I’m trying to find myself.” But what are we looking for? Identities seem to be all people have: All we stand for, all we’re known as, all we know about ourselves. Who is to define an identity or what it should be comprised of? Several people try and dictate how to think of ourselves or how to categorize our identity. Education and experience are tools to help a person develop their sense of selfhood, but the ultimate definition comes from within. Through several readings, the idea of one’s personal identity can be challenged, enlarged, conflicted, or resolved. However, as a young adult seeking to find himself, I have learned that in order to become who I am, I must embrace where I come from, love my heritage, and then work on being the best I can be.

 

We, as college students, are at the most impressionable stages of our lives. It is up to us to become ourselves. Just thinking of that concept alone frightens me. Every class we take, every word we say, or every action we perform help shape us to be individuals in a great, big society. Entering Kohlberg’s stage of moral skepticism at 4.5 is exactly what we need to break the social confines, think on our own, and develop personal opinions true to our own beliefs (Kohlberg). As we learn and develop, the path to figuring out our identity tends to get easier and more finite. Identity can mean lots of different things to a great many people because of how personal the topic can become. Each one of us must grow on our own and find what identifies them as an individual.

 

As a Modern Orthodox Jew from the Syrian community of Brooklyn, I have to find myself the hard way. Coming from a community with set boundaries and rules---such as who I can marry, where I may eat and pray, or who I am permitted to hang out with---really can hinder one’s growth. We call it the “Syrian bubble” because many community teenagers feel sheltered from the outside world, only being exposed to what our parents allow us to see. As per community custom, children usually have a choice between two local yeshivas to attend from upper nursery through high school, and then often pick a local college or simply work in the family business. This leaves little room for exploration in life, since we have generally the same friends since the age of five. With a constant curiosity of what “real” teenagers in public schools are doing and how it would be to have friends of a different race or religion, most of my friends and I feel like we are at a disadvantage in life, being excluded from almost everything the world has to offer. For this reason, I found the message in “The Allegory of the Cave” by Plato to sit so strongly with me. Throughout my upbringing I felt as if I was chained up, forced to only see projections on the wall. It is only when I am set free from my chains that I am allowed to go out and experience the world. Similarly to the allegory, not everyone is freed and not everyone is so comfortable with being freed. Only once we explore real life and “look at the sun” does the development of a sense of self begin (Plato). For me, my sense of freedom came from going to college. I left my “bubble” cave and went on to learn things on my own. It took me some time to adjust to the light, but now that I see clearly, I am learning a lot about the world and can finally begin to morph into my own. “The Allegory of the Cave” helped me reinforce the actions I’ve taken in my life to find my identity and to become the fully immersed person I aspire to become.

However, one cannot be the person he wants to become until he begin to own himself. Our perfections and flaws are what make us people, and each of us have qualities that make us unique. I think one of the hardest things for someone to do is to take pride in who he is, even if that’s what makes him different. To be honest, I was always a little embarrassed to tell people I meet that I am Jewish, speak perfect Hebrew, and observe all holidays and traditions. Gloria Anzaldua opened my eyes and showed me the value of loving myself. In “How to Tame a Wild Tongue,” she writes of the hardships that she, as a Chicana woman, faces in her life. She goes on to say that many Chicana immigrants often drop their native language and learn English to avoid awkward situations (39). I can relate to this because as I was learning Hebrew throughout my entire childhood education, I kept on thinking to myself that I would never need this language, since it is primarily spoken in only one country and is pretty obsolete. As I got older, I secretly started dropping my family’s orthodox values by eating non-kosher foods, using electricity on Sabbath, and skipping a few prayers. When I thought on Anzaldua’s essay, I exposed another portion of my identity that I had tried keeping secret. She furthers her claims by saying, “There are more subtle ways that we internalize identification, especially in the forms of images and emotions. For me food and certain smells are tied to my identity, to my homeland" (42). Syrian and Middle Eastern foods, aromas, and words are a staple in my household. These things along with speaking Hebrew and keeping my Jewish faith are so ingrained in my upbringing that they practically make up who I am. Without Anazaldua’s words I probably would not have been as enlarged as I am now. Embracing the past and keeping true to where you come from are essential components to develop one’s self.

After a person is secure with himself, he can then focus on being a leader. There were several times that I was a leader, whether it be leading my entire grade to victory in a high school color war or directing 40 of my peers through the deserts of Israel; being somebody to look up to is one of my strong suits. I thought that I was a confident, strong leader since I’ve taken courses in leadership development and gone to international leadership training programs. Having read “Letter from Birmingham Jail” by Martin Luther King Jr, I realized that not only do I have a long way to go, but once I think I am the best I can be, I still have more to go. Throughout reading the letter I was in awe. What struck me most was how calm was his composure. As a rhetoric communications major, I took particular interest in his persuasion techniques. He uses friendly terms such as “dear” when referring to the clergymen even though they were his enemies (par. 1). Even more so, he breaks down the problem so that each part is clear and understandable. There is also much to learn from his personal life. I cannot imagine being bold enough to take a bullet for what I believe in. He paid the ultimate price for his cause and that speaks volumes about who he was and how much each of a leader he was.

 

Martin Luther King Jr found his calling in life, but some of us aren’t as lucky and are constantly try to fit in somewhere. We are strangers in our skin, not knowing who we are or where we belong until the time is right. I have studied throughout my Jewish education what it means to be a global citizen. The questions of a “Jewish American” or an “American Jew” have been topics of discussion my entire life. After much self-reflection, I chose not to be either one of them. I don’t believe in having a national identity because I feel that people should be free to be whatever they want. It goes without question that I love my countries, both America and Israel, and remain loyal to them both. I just don’t think that a person must associate himself with a country simply because he was born thete. I am a firm believer of Gestalt's saying: “The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.” Instead of me feeling like a small piece of something, I’d rather think of myself as a whole to my own. Reading “How I Finally Developed Some National Pride” by Sezin Koehler really conflicted with my ideas of identity. In the article, Koehler, an American of Sri Lankan descent, claims to never have had a sense of a national identity until gay marriage was legalized in America. What she felt she says, was “a strange feeling…pride” (par. 9). She was proud of her country and the progress Americans are making towards acceptance. I do not condemn national pride; sadly I have just never felt it. That doesn’t mean that I will never identify myself with a country; it means that no country has caused me to internally call it mine, to make me feel proud to belong to it.

Identifying ourselves is probably one of the hardest things to do. Each person must go on his own path to find his truth. It is interesting to see how every individual starts off the same as innocent blank slates and then slowly but surely becomes his or her own. Like a snowflake, no two people are the same. With the help of Anzaldua, Koehler, and Plato, I have embarked on the journey of finding myself. I learned that through education, and acceptance of my history I can work on myself to be a leader and a global citizen. Hopefully I find myself and am ultimately happy with who I become.

Works Cited

Anzaldua, Gloria. "How to Tame a Wild Tongue: Wanderwords in Theory." Wanderwords : Language   Migration in American Literature (2014): n. pag. Web.

King, Martin Luther, Jr. "Letter from a Birmingham Jail [King, Jr.]." Letter from a Birmingham Jail [King, Jr.]. N.p., n.d. Web. 07 Dec. 2015.

"Kohlberg's Stages of Moral Development." Chart of Lawrence. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Nov. 2015

Koehler, Sezin. "How I Finally Developed Some National Pride." The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, n.d. Web. 07 Dec. 2015.

Plato. "The Allegory of the Cave From the Republic of Plato." About.com Education. N.p., n.d. Web. 07 Dec. 2015.

 

Top of Form

 

We the Students: Independence and Ethical Growth as the Path to Greater Career Succes by Victoria Leto

Turning eighteen opens the door to adulthood for most of us teenagers. It is the time decision-making and psychological growth as an individual starts. Lawrence Kohlberg rates the individual’s advanced thinking and growth on his Moral Development scale. Observing the developments on this scale, one will notice that students reach each level at different ages depending on their maturity. Ultimately, of all the traits students must acquire, I believe that independence is the characteristic that will bring students to their highest level of ethical behavior. No one can force this upon us; we must see and understand this for ourselves.

Kohlberg’s scale is set up in six different developmental stages which illustrate one’s strengths in solving moral dilemmas which I define as choosing between two or more actions and having a moral reason for each. The stages are grouped into three levels: pre-conventional, conventional, and post-conventional.

The purpose of Kolhberg’s structure is to examine people’s behaviors. It is not so much a ranking of behaviors, but a set of insights into why people do what they do. For example, the responsibilities that we as college students hold may be studying for a final or writing a paper. The goal is to do well on both in order to attain a high GPA. At level 1, if your grade isn’t as high as you expected, you will realize maybe the test was just not what you imagined or the teacher was a tough grader. However, being at a level 6, you will accept responsibility for your actions and not blame your grade on other factors. That is part of being independent.

As teenagers, we don’t just become independent; some kind of experience may open our eyes to a world of freedom that makes us become rely more on ourselves, not others. Whether we are influenced by our peers, parents, or professors, we form a sense of our own independence. Conformity is not always a good thing; if we all choose to be the same, how will our world grow? College campuses may try conform us, but we don’t have to give in. If one thinks about it, we come into our courses hoping to become better educated and more open minded, not to fall into other’s opinions. Forming our own ideas and opinions is what makes us independent. Lola Solis, a freshman at Hofstra University wrote a powerful essay titled “The Anti-Conformist,” in which she speaks about a literature class offered Hofstra, taught by Professor Pellegrino, that opened her eyes. “When reading novels I no longer have to wait for him to explain the underlying meaning of the text. I create my own meaning. In high school, when deciphering novels, I never had the ability to construct my own thoughts. I have now been able to break those cultural barriers and examine language and make the worldview my own. I do not only think this way in literature, but in all aspects of life” (Solis).

Obviously, this professor left a mark on his student, but she has taken his teachings and made them her own. Professor Pellegrino did not force any beliefs onto Lola; she was able to form her own through his teachings. It is important that we as students do not just listen and believe, but listen and penetrate into our own thoughts. Her professor was so moved by her essay that he sent it to his chairperson. A student made a professor feel worthy! Lola has become bigger in the sense that she now knows that meanings doesn’t have to be taught, but understood on our own terms.

As my journey towards college began, I wasn’t as much nervous as I was relieved. I was so happy to be advancing my education on a new campus. In high school, I lost most of my friends due to the high school “drama” which is really just immaturity. The common partying and drinking aspect of high school, as well as the cattiness among friends, was never appealing to me. I wanted to do well in school and make my parents proud. This led me to become more independent. My parents always told me I was mature for my age as I wasn’t focused on the same things as other students. I wanted to be successful and make something of myself. I never relied on anyone or anything to help me; I helped me. I didn’t need a group of friends to feel “cool.” I needed confidence, independence, and intelligence. A high school guidance counselor says it best: “It’s tough to be a teenager. You want to be independent while still having to rely on everyone around you” (Facebook). I was and still am determined to achieve my goals on my own. I have always known I wanted to be a “helper.” My experiences of volunteering at children programs, being a camp counselor, tutoring, and babysitting made my passion for kids grow. I absolutely adore children and somehow I wanted to incorporate them in my career. With much research I found that Speech Pathology was not only interesting, but rewarding. I could work with children and adults at a school or a hospital, and this  fact led me to change my major. I am content with the changes Hofstra has offered me and intend on becoming more worldly. My path has already changed, and I feel without my independence I would have been lost.

Entering college you choose your major, your classes, and eventually your career path. Notice how each chose has you in it? Becoming more independent may come with age, experience, and maturity. With the guidance of your guardians and the advice of you advisors, you will achieve you goals. However, you are the one making the choices, and every step you take is solely by yourself. College is your time to make your dreams a reality, but this can only be done with a clear mind and self awareness. While emailing with Jade, a freshman at Hofstra, she talked about the process of choosing a major, saying: “My major is business. Although I am undecided on the specific business, I am leaning towards either accounting, entrepreneurship, or both. I chose to study business because I had an interest in it back in high school. I took college accounting in senior year and really loved it...I see myself in the future hopefully opening up my own dance studio with my sisters (who are dancers as well). We all dream about this, and I hope we can make it a reality one day!” (Chu). She expressed her love and dedication for ice skating and dancing and told me of her experiences teaching young children. She is a perfect example of a student who is using her right and left brain strengths to emerge into a stronger individual. Who would have thought a love for dance and business could somehow coincide into a bigger dream? In order to reach your full potential, you must set goals for yourself and strive to reach them.

College students and Kohlberg seem to have something in common: they both are reaching for potential. Every college student will reach level 6 of moral development at some point in his college career. Many students may have already attained this level of universal ethical principles. When children and teenagers grow up in specific settings, they may look at life situations differently. Independence comes differently to all of us, and Kohlberg was well aware of this. We are all capable of understanding others, ourselves, and the world around us. Our right as citizens is to be independent with the knowledge that it is under reasonable circumstances (Wikipedia). Entering a college campus is a new world for many students, especially those who are coming from households or towns that held them back. Students desire the freedom and acknowledgment of being their own person. A freshman at Hofstra named Kelsey proves that breaking out of the bubble we call home is life changing. “I don't rely on others to do anything I could do myself for I am internally motivated and don't require a push from anyone. All and all, I would say that I am forging my way from a controlled and held-back household to be an independent student with her own unique set of views and morals. I’m independent in the sense also that I don't really pay any mind to the influence of the viewpoints of others, and I am not very easily influenced. I am, however, confident in my beliefs and choices which I feel makes me very independent” (Picciano). Students like Kelsey know they can fight through the conventions of society and be unique on their own. It was her choice to interview her writing professor for a paper in his class to show her classmates how fascinating she found him to be. She was able to make them see that their respect for him should go beyond the that fact he is responsible for their grades by revealing him as genuine, real person. She wasn’t afraid of what they would think of her. If you are able to build a self-esteem that allows you to move forward positively, you will gain a strong independence on your college campus.

Most eighteen-year-old college students are thinking about their futures and not about Kolhberg’s theory of moral development which actually maps out the steps for success in learning how to learn. To see and feel and think and live at the highest level (six), however, a sense of independence is necessary as Lola, Jade, Kelsey, and I have found out .



                                         Works Cited

 

Chu, Jade. “Personal Interview.” Message to the author. 8 Nov. 2015. E-mail.

Facebook. “Humans of New York.” Web. 10 Nov. 2015.

Lawerence Kohlberg. Wikipedia. Wikimedia Foundation. Web. 28 July. 2015.

Picciano, Kelsey. “Personal Interview.” Message to the author. 8 Nov. 2015. E-mail.

Solis, Lola. “The Anti-Conformist” 21 Oct. 2015. Essay.

United States Declaration of Independence. Wikipedia. Wikimedia Foundation. Web. 16 Oct. 2015.