A Tale of Two Angels: Painful Past and Precious Present by Haley Ecker

Sun or moon. Black or white. Rain or shine. Day or night. These are all opposites, describing two polar ends of specific spectrums involving color, nature, space, and time. These are all broad gestalts, but it is because of their major differences that we often are forced to choose between the two poles. We recognize that there are mediums between these poles, being noon, the color grey, a clear night sky, and an overcast day. It is the choice between the two poles; however, that choice encourages us to look at the middle.

Wim Wenders introduces two figures in The Wings of Desire that represent two other poles: present and past. Damiel and Cassiel are two angels that overlook the residents of a Berlin Wall-divided Germany. After watching and listening to the hopes and dreams of a melancholic trapeze artist, Damiel begins to consider trading his immortality for a regular life amongst the rest of the humans that he and Cassiel watch over. Cassiel does not share this same desire to trade in his immortality and debates Damiel about the worth of becoming human in the context of all the tragedies they have had to witness. Wenders uses the angels to represent two sides of humanity, with Damiel being the incarnation for hope and love for the present and Cassiel being the depiction of humanity’s disdain and constant looking-over-the-shoulder-motion toward the past. With these two contrasts, Wenders is able to demonstrate how living in the moment, rather than staying in the past, is what helps to bring about a full, meaningful life.

           

The core difference in the fundamentals of the two angels can be seen in the people they choose to interact with. Damiel, our angel of the precious present, is often seen watching over smiling young children such as a young girl coloring on an airplane (Wenders, 00:04:12) and another girl sitting next to him at the circus (Wenders, 00:56:58). Both children appear to acknowledge his presence and smile at him as if they can actually see him, despite the fact that the angels are not typically seen with the naked eye. Cassiel, on the other hand, is viewed less often with smiling children and more so with somber adults reminiscing about the misery of the past, such as Homer, an old man who recollects about how Berlin used to look prior to World War II and the rise of the Berlin Wall (Wenders, 00:42:11).

While the elderly people Cassiel follows focus more on the past perils of Berlin, the children Damiel watches tend to focus more on playing games and being entertained. These kids are too preoccupied living in the moment to worry about the past. There is some purity in that only the children notice the angels’ presence – they lack a closed off imagination and desire to dwell on the past. This is analogous to those who can appreciate life’s beauty and those who cannot. The children do not know as much pain as the elderly since they have yet to experience any real tragedies. Ariana Farajollah best describes this idea in her blog post on Taking Giants Steps Press, stating that “the children, not yet corrupted by the limits of the rational mind, easily sense the comfort emitted by Damiel” (Farajollah, par. 7). Although naive, there is something simply beautiful about this; the children still have hopes and dreams to fill and are able to be in the present. 

           

Damiel is more interested in objects in the moment and entranced by the normalcy of human life. This is why he chooses to surround himself with happy, young children rather than the same depressed folks that Cassiel watches. In fact, when Damiel invites Cassiel to watch the circus discussed earlier, he is seen moving further away from Damiel and the kids as opposed to getting closer to the lively show (Wenders, 0:56:58). He appears significantly less excited to watch the performance and be around the youthful children than Damiel does. Instead of following and watching Homer with Cassiel, Damiel imagines twirling around a pen with his fingers in Homer’s library (Wenders, 0:19:44). He studies the pen as Cassiel listens to Homer think about how much Berlin has changed. As observed in how he watches Homer from the upper level of the library, Cassiel constantly distances himself from humans. Damiel, on the other hand, is willing to walk alongside the humans and get close to them. This distancing from the present is representative of how we humans tend to distance ourselves from the moment. Wenders uses a constantly “drifting camera” to further establish Cassiel’s distance from the present (Singer, par. 7). Once Damiel becomes human, the audience gets less of a bird’s eye view and more of a “dynamic, street-level” look at the present alongside Damiel (Singer, par. 7).

          

The difference between Damiel and Cassiel is ever more apparent through Wenders’s use of color. For the majority of the film, the viewers see through the monochromatic lens of the angels. Henri Alekan, the cinematographer of Wings of Desire, is responsible for this artistic decision, as the “sepia-tinged black-and-white imagery [depicts] the angels’ muted vision of the world. Ironically, [Alekan’s] rich, creamy monochrome might appear too gorgeously tactile for the angels’ non-sensory world” (Singer, par. 5). This observation makes sense because the only times the screen flips to vibrant color is when Damiel gets physically closer to Marion, the somber trapeze artist from the circus (Wenders, 00:35:17), and when he eventually becomes human (Wenders, 01:31:38). This never happens to Cassiel, however. In fact, when Damiel firmly admits his desires for becoming human, he and Cassiel turn around and notice that there is only one set of footprints behind them now (Wenders, 01:31:28). This is emblematic of Damiel’s transformation. The footprints and color of Damiel’s new life are representative of how life becomes more vibrant when one chooses to live in the moment. Cassiel’s constant black-and-white lens harkens back to how old Hollywood films use to only be in black and white. Like these old movies, Cassiel is still looking back instead of looking forward, following around old remnants of Berlin, and continuously recollecting on the people and scenarios he witnessed centuries ago.

           

It is those who tend to look toward the past rather than live in the present that live some of the most painful lives around. Both Cassiel and Damiel deal with individuals near death in the film. While Damiel chooses to comfort a victim of a crash through reaching out and petting his head (Wenders, 00:36:30), Cassiel tries to prevent a man from jumping off the top of a building. Damiel does not intervene from the impending death of the person he is with. Cassiel, however, completely tries to use his powers to get the person he is observing to not jump off the roof. He tries so hard to prevent this tragedy from occurring that when the man does jump, Cassiel screams in anguish at the top of his lungs (Wenders, 01:09:00). This is the only time in the entire film where Cassiel appears to show any emotion. He is upset because he had to witness someone willingly throw away their life. His reaction leads one to question whether this is the first time he has had to witness such a harrowing event. Cassiel takes a more preventative approach rather than just letting things happen naturally, as his counterpart would. While it is sad watching a person take their own life, this situation shows how we cannot always prevent the past from reoccurring or the present from occurring. We have to let things happen naturally, even if it will lead us down a painful path. Cassiel’s attempt to avoid this pain makes the viewer see how hard it is to not let the world unfold as it appears to do so. Sometimes, we have to let the chips fall where they may and just be there in the moment when it all comes crashing down.

           

The first scene of the film is Damiel looking over the city with a silhouette of his wings. The very last scene of the film, conversely, is Cassiel looking sadly over the city on the same building his counterpart was on (Wenders, 02:04:31). His friend is finally able to feel and experience all the things they never could do as angels, from drinking coffee, to running in the street, to feeling blood course through their veins. Damiel is clearly so much happier back down on Earth walking amongst the citizens and holding Marion in his arms. The difference between the two perspectives of the angels can better be described by Peter Handke’s poem, “Song Of Being a Child.” Handke writes about the mind of a child when it is young versus when it grows old:

Many people seem beautiful to [the child]

And now not so many and now only if [the child is] lucky

[The child] had a precise picture of paradise

And now can only conceive of it at best

[The child] couldn’t imagine nothingness. (41-45)

Lines 41, 43, and 45 perfectly describe Damiel’s attitude and demeanor; he sees all the beauty in the world and is so full of life because he is able to appreciate the “paradise” of the present. On the contrary, lines 42 and 44 seem to better fit Cassiel’s narrative. In the places where Damiel sees beauty, Cassiel only sees pain and what will eventually become future tragedies. He lacks the same amount of optimism for humanity that Damiel has. Similar to writer Michael O’Malley, Damiel genuinely believes that “humanity is naturally good… everywhere there are people who naturally feel inclined to help each other, even if they are strangers” (O’Malley, par. 2). Cassiel clings to the cynical mindset that based on the past events of history (especially World War II and the Cold War), humanity is not some sort of paradise. The past will only continue to repeat the same tragedies over and over again until the end of time. This is why he connects so much with Homer– his thoughts about how Berlin has come to ruins only further supports Cassiel’s misgivings about mankind.

           

It is understandable to be wary of the past like Cassiel. That is why we study world history, after all. Humankind has made so many erroneous blunders over the course of time that it makes sense as to why Cassiel would rather watch from a distance as he sees the world crumble and boil into an abyss of agony, bound to repeat the same mistakes we made centuries ago. One must not always be this pessimistic, though. There are so many beautiful things around us that if we continue to dwell on the past, we will forget about how amazing the present is. We may forget to relish in once-in-a-lifetime moments because we worry too much. This is no way to live life. We have an entire lifetime to worry about our past mistakes and the ones we might make in the future. That is why we must choose Damiel’s pole: the present. Appreciating the simple things about life, like Damiel desired for so long, is how we become more positive individuals. Each moment only happens once in your entire life, so live boundlessly and lovingly. Today is the youngest you will ever be from now on and the oldest you have ever been. Enjoy the precious present and take your mind away from the painful past.

Works Cited

Farajollah, Ariana. “It Is the Little Things That Make Life Big.” Blogspot. N.p. 21 Sept. 2017, http://giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2017/09/it-is-little-things-that-make-life-big.html. Accessed 3 May 2019.

Handke, Peter. “Song of Being a Child.” Peter Handke – Song of Being a Child, edited by Poetry Bar. Wordpress.com, 2009. Accessed 7 May 2019.

O’Malley, Michael. “Comfortably Numb with an Infected Humanity.” Blogspot. N.p. 31 Oct. 2018, http://giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2018/10/. Accessed 3 May 2019.

Singer, Leigh. “Five Visual Themes in Wings of Desire – Wim Wenders' Immortal Film about Watching.” British Film Institute, 14 Sept. 2016, www.bfi.org.uk/news-opinion/news-bfi/features/five-visual-themes-wings-desire-immortal-film-about-watching. Accessed 6 May 2019.

Wenders, Wim (Dir.). Wings of Desire. Perf. Bruno Ganz and Solveig Dommartin. Road Movies, 1987. Accessed 7 May 2019.

Trading in Chains for Wings: A Close Look at WINGS OF DESIRE by Lauren Cohen

Confronting one’s past can be a terrifying experience, especially when that means reopening nearly-healed wounds that are still sore to the touch. Unfortunately, in order to find oneself, suppressing emotions is not an option. Sometimes in order to truly heal, one must dig deep into those old wounds as a way to figure out who it is they are meant to be, or at least that is the experience I have had. I am the type of person who always ran away from my past and never looked back to see how it may have been affecting me as an individual. For years, I was scared of reflecting on my life and never once did I consider the idea that there may be a reason anxiety and depression entered my life so early on. I never considered this might be why I never fully healed. Through Wim Wenders’ beautiful 1987 film, Wings of Desire, I am now able to realize that I have allowed my past to become a chain that is holding me back. With that, I have also been able to use four characters from the movie to identify the exact chains that I have attached to myself and begin the process of breaking free from them, turning them into newly found wings. Through this, I have been able to turn my wounds to scars, scars that let me know I was hurt, but that I survived. 

1. The Man on the Ledge

Towards the middle of the movie, Cassiel confronts a young man sitting on the ledge of a building. The man is contemplating suicide, unable to remedy his broken heart. Cassiel attempts to ease the mind of the man and try to prevent him from jumping, but to no avail (Wenders 1:09:01). The man could not feel Cassiel helping him. He could not feel any ease to the pain he felt and would do anything possible to feel relief. While watching the movie, I deeply resonated with this man.

One area of my life that I am never afraid to discuss is my mental health. I am very blunt with the fact that I have severe anxiety and mild depression. However, I often leave out one piece of my mental health. I do not mean to leave it out, but I would rather people not know the dark thoughts that often control my mind (and still sometimes do to this day).

Unknown to almost every individual in my life, I understood what that man on the ledge was going through because I nearly took my own life; the only difference was that I was able to feel my angel trying to save me. I did not know it at the time, but looking back, I now know that an angel, like Cassiel, was with me in my room. There is always an angel out there trying to help a suffering individual, but it is just a matter of feeling them and knowing that they are there to make the person feel less alone. Looking back on my moment of darkness, I can identify the exact thoughts that were whirling around in my young mind. Now I understand why they were there in the first place.

March 20, 2013. I remember that night as if it were yesterday. Like the man in the movie, I thought: “This time I’m doing it. Funny I’m so calm” (Wenders 1:07:30). It was around six o’clock and I had just gotten back from a day at Bay Academy, my middle school where I experienced the worst cyber and verbal bullying of my life. On that particular day, my depressive thoughts consumed me. They were telling me how it was my fault that my family nearly lost our house just barely a year and a half prior; how I was the reason that my parents were constantly yelling at each other; that I was to blame for having “friends” in elementary school who abandoned me and began to make fun of me; that it was my fault that any bad event had occurred in my life up to that point. As I sat in my room bawling my eyes out, hands trembling, barely able to breathe, I looked at my dresser in front of me, where I saw the razor from a broken sharpener pleading to be used. And I heard the voice in my head telling me:  “Do it; End the pain.” My mind was racing, thinking similar words to the man on the ledge: “All these thoughts. I’d really rather not think anymore” (Wenders 1:08:53). I was ready to say goodbye to my pain for good, but then I felt an angelic-like presence. It was a presence I had not felt for nearly 7 years, as it reminded me of my father’s mother who had passed away when I was 6 years old. She wrapped me up in a hug and told me that I would be okay. That I needed to choose to live. And so, I did.

As KP stated, “You are not ready to face an angel. They will rip you apart and leave you unstable and with a homeostatic upset" (Gordon, Class Discussion). I was terrified of what this presence was. I had never felt anything like it before. But I somehow felt safe again. I knew that I had to keep going, even if it caused me tremendous pain. I understood why “Wenders celebrates life by telling the audience to become proactive and live” (Orellana, par. 4).  I now comprehend the reason for my lowest point. Unlike the man in the movie who was heartbroken, I was caught up in my past and had allowed it to consume me. It held me down like an anchor while also holding me back like a chain. It took until 2019, six years later, to come to terms with the fact that it had nothing to do with not being “enough,” but had everything to do with being stuck in the past and feeling lost. It had to do with emotions, not truth. Somehow it is comforting to know that there are other people in this huge world who experience this feeling every day. Do I wish I could take their pain away as well? Of course, but for now, I will have to suffice with the knowledge that I can help ease their pain and work with others to dig into why these thoughts are there. With that in mind, I am now able to dig deeper into the why for my feeling lost and try to understand it.

2. The Trapeze Artist, AKA Marion

Marion is a French woman who travels to Germany to be a part of the circus, the one thing that she loves the most in life. Ironically, it is like a safety net for her, despite not having one during her act. However, towards the beginning of the movie, it is revealed that the circus she is a part of will be having its last performance that night as they have run out of money. Knowing that the circus is closing leaves Marion feeling broken, depressed, and even suicidal, leading her to consider an “accidental” sabotage for her performance later that night (Wenders 28:45). She goes back to her trailer and thinks about her future; she considers going back to her waitressing job, while also considers the fact that she is “Like a small animal, lost in the woods,” who is left wondering, “Who are you? I don’t know anymore” (Wenders 30:19). She feels as though the one thing that brought her joy in life is now gone forever. However, she does use music as an escape from this hurt and confused feeling.

However, it can be seen in Marion’s eyes that she feels as though her life’s purpose and passion is gone. She says, “My circus dream, souvenirs for 10 years from now” (Wenders 28:01). Her lifelong dream is fading away right in front of her eyes and she does not know what to do with the little pieces of her that are left behind. For me, these words resonated on a deeper level, as I myself have known the pain of losing a dream that I had for a long time. Slowly but surely, I could feel my so-called dream slipping away, leaving me in what felt like a confusing maze.

Two years ago, much like Marion after the circus closed, I began to feel lost. It all began when one of the most important people in my life, my grandmother, passed away. She always did her best to make sure I felt loved, even though she never directly said it to me. The phrase “I love you” was not freely spoken. However, through her actions and words, I could feel that all she wanted for me was to be happy and safe. That is why when she moved onto the spiritual world, for the first time in my life I felt completely vulnerable. I had no clue what to do in order to fight for myself. I felt terrified and confused for the rest of 2017 and into the beginning of 2018. However, my pain reached a peak in February of 2018, a month after I had committed to Hofstra University. I felt as though I was not living the life I wanted, and this made me feel even more scared and dazed than when my grandmother passed. Sure, I still wanted to attend Hofstra, but I realized that the career path I chose was not the one I wanted. Unfortunately, this was a path that I had envisioned since I was 12 years old. Because I had been on that journey for six years, I was terrified to deviate from it, even though I knew it was not my dream I was chasing. I realized that I had been “carnally guided” by my family and society, just so I did not lose “the approval of those who had little concern for my well-being” (Araya, par. 2). I was also desperately trying to keep my family’s approval when it came to my career choice. I was stuck in Lawrence Kohlberg’s stage 3 of development where I “act[ed] in ways to avoid disapproval” (Amidon, par. 8) in order to prevent my family from abandoning me. However, as the beginning of college approached and the summer came to an end, I realized that I had to break free from the place I was stuck in. The only problem with it was realizing why I was stuck: the fear of my family abandoning me again. And although it is terrifying to confront it, I know now that if I am to find my own path, the path to my true passion, I need to break free from not only my family’s expectations, but the chains placed on me by them and my past in general.

3. The Angel, AKA Damiel

For as long as I can remember, I was never “enough” to my family. They never showed me love the way other families do; they never allowed me to be my true self, and would constantly berate me for being “different.” I used to be a very bubbly, outgoing, talkative, funny and sassy child, but I was constantly yelled at for being all the things that made me me. I was told it was somehow “wrong” to be positive and an overly friendly person who saw the best in everyone. Even worse, I was never allowed to follow the passions I wanted. Although I do love to sing, act, and dance, it was never something that I truly wanted. My parents introduced it to me and would do whatever it took to keep me there, even if it meant keeping me away from my real love: film. Despite barely being able to afford all the different dancing, acting, and vocal lessons, my parents would push me to do it while telling me I was never trying hard enough or that I would never make it. And, unfortunately, I believed them. I still remember believing that singing was helping my anxiety issues. Although there are brief moments where it brings me peace, I soon realized that music overall was actually worsening the anxiety. I was in fear that I was never going to be “enough” for my parents. Growing up, they would often yell at each other about not being good enough individuals or trying hard enough in life, leading me to wonder: If my parents were not enough for each other, how could I be enough for them?

Soon though, I realized that, as Jim Adkins wrote for his band, Jimmy Eat World’s 2001 smash hit, “The Middle,” “It doesn't matter if it’s good enough for someone else” (Jimmy Eat World) because it only had to be enough for me. With this realization came another one: I was just like Damiel. Both of us felt as though we were not living the lives we desired and we both wanted to gain new experiences. The difference, however, is that Damiel wishes to be like the humans that he has been protecting for eternity, while I wish to be the person I have dreamed about being my entire life. Damiel has his heart set on Marion throughout the film, pleading to do more than love her from afar. However, we see him discuss with Cassiel how he is “fed up with [his] spiritual existence” (Wenders 13:24) and how he wants to have the ability of “coming home after a long day to feed a cat like Philip Marlowe” (Wenders 14:29). He wants to participate in the activities that he observes every day. He feels as though he has “Been on the outside long enough . . . Absent long enough” (Wenders 1:04:38) and wants to be a part of the history that he watches go by every day. He longs for the ability to love and feel like those that he protects. Although Damiel and I are experiencing different forms of longing, I understand what it is like to feel as though the life, spiritual or physical, that one has been provided is not the life that was meant for them. I have a desire for so much more than what was told or given to me and it is comforting to see that even an angel can have a desire for those things as well.

I long for the day when I can freely talk to someone without the fear that I am a burden or that they will think of me as a “weirdo.” I yearn to be able to talk to my parents without the underlying fear that they will be upset with me for pursuing a career that I want. And most of all, I dream of living in a society and a family that chooses “a power to join” (O’Malley, par. 10) as opposed to “a power to prevent” (O’Malley par. 6). Like Damiel, I want to be able to be the person I want to be and I have to find myself before anything else. I also know that to meet these goals I have to take a risk and get out of my comfort zone in order to become who I want to be just like Damiel did when he gave up his eternal life (Wenders 1:31:30).

So far, I have been able to stand up to my parents and have proved them wrong on their belief that I would not be able to take care of myself at college. I have also been able to fight for what I want and can proudly say that I am finally a film major, even if that means I do not have my family’s full support. I am breaking free of the chains that have been placed on me by learning to accept my past instead of running from it. I am breaking free of the chain that hid who I really am: a funny, friendly, kind-hearted, somewhat opinionated, overly caring girl with a slight attitude from Brooklyn who gives more than she gets, but also knows what she deserves. I am finally able to see the colors and bright lights that have been hidden from me just as Damiel finally saw color for the first time in his life. Both our lives were lived in a black and white world, and it finally is transforming into a colorful, whimsical world.

Although it has been a tough battle, and the war is far from over, I know I am not alone. I have my best friend, Jacklyn, fighting with me and cheering me on. And I know that my grandmother is standing by my side, like the angels in the movie, pushing me towards my end goal. I have been able to create my own community where the feeling of alienation does not exist and where anyone who needs love will receive that love. The wings to becoming my newly found person are close, but I also know that before I can have them, and in order to fly off to whoever I am to become or get my suit of armor like Damiel (Wenders 1:32:19), I must first look deeper into my past and my present to appreciate what life is truly about.

4. The Dying Man on the Bridge

Something that everybody says is important is to appreciate the little things in life. These little things are the beautifully colored trees in the fall or a summer breeze. They are the joys of hanging out with a group of friends or even falling in love. Although I realize that other people will think of it differently, I have learned to appreciate these little idiosyncrasies of life. Comforted by Damiel, the man who is dying after getting in a motorcycle accident begins to remember these little pieces of life, “The Southern Cross. The Far East. The great North. The Wild West . . . . Stromboli. The old houses of Charlottenburg. Albert Camus. The morning light. The eyes of the child.” (Wenders 36:48). Seeing him remember these “unimportant” aspects of life has caused me to look back on my past and observe little moments that have made my life worth living.

As he is leaning on the curb slowly losing his life, he considers the things he should have done. For instance, he thinks. “Karin, I should have told you,” (Wenders 36:22) and how “It can’t be that simple, I’ve still so much to do” (Wenders 36:26). He continues to think of the things he could have done in the past until Damiel beings to whisper in his ear all the little things that have made his life grand. It is with this that I began to see my past differently.

When considering my past, I see these little moments that I would always forget because of the amount of pain caused by bigger incidents. These moments I have found, however, have a far more and deeper meaning than I let on; for instance, the joy that I had when I first found out I got into Hofstra. It was a December morning in my English class and I knew that I would find out sometime that week, so I let curiosity get the best of me, and I checked my Hofstra portal. I was not expecting the “Welcome to the Pride” to pop up on my iPhone and I began to freak out from joy, literally falling out of my chair because of the excitement. Finding out about Hofstra would always slip my mind due to the pain I still felt from losing my grandmother earlier that year. I was still hurting, so my memory of this exciting and pivotal moment was hindered by that of sorrow. But now the moment is brighter and I am able to appreciate it more.

One of the most touching moments I am very fond of now is a panic attack I had after an acting lesson in preparation for my upcoming high school auditions. I was in the car with my father and my best friend Jacklyn, after a rough rehearsal. But me being me, I did not show that I was upset nor that I felt like a failure. However, as we drove off, I broke into tears and began having a full-fledged panic attack. It would be the first of many times that Jacklyn would see me in this state. The reason I love this little moment so much is that it made me realize that she accepts me for who I am. She has been the one person since that moment who I know will always be there for me when it feels like no one else will be. And it is with the help of my best friend that I am no longer scared to break free of my past and my chains if it means becoming a person that I am happy with.

I know it is a long journey, and I am only at the beginning, but I am excited to see the person that comes out on the other side. Since last semester, KP has inspired me to be the person that I want to be and not a person that someone else wants me to be. Through his help, my best friend, some therapy, and Wenders’ movie, I am finally able to say that I am free. I am no longer held down from the pressures I have let control my life for the past 19 years. I have been spared of the societal pressure that has consumed my thoughts for as long as I can remember. I am open to being a person who is happy with herself again and is unafraid to feel. I have realized that I need to live for me, and not for anyone else. I will always be a person who cares for others before herself, but I realize now that before I can help others, I have to help myself. I am ready for a bloody battle or two, but if it means winning the war to be myself, then so be it. I am finally free to show my battle wounds and show others that, if I survived, then others can too. As my favorite band, All Time Low said, I have to “Hold on tight, [because] this ride is a wild one” (All Time Low, “Missing You”), but I am ready for the ride. I am ready to find me. I have accepted my past, learned to love it, and am learning how to live with wings instead of chains. 

Works Cited

All Time Low, “Missing You,” Future Hearts, John Feldmann, 2015

Amidon, Joel, et al. “Kohlberg's Stages of Moral Development.” Lumen, 

https://courses.lumenlearning.com/teachereducationx92x1/chapter/kohlbergs-stages-of-moral-development/. 

Araya, Betty. “The Revolution Is Love.” Taking Giant Steps, 9 Oct. 2018, 

https://giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2018/10/the-revolution-is-love-20-by-betty-araya.html 

Gordon, Paul Kirpal. Class Discussion. 24, Apr. 2019

Jimmy Eat World, “The Middle,” Bleed American, Mark Trombino, 2001

O’Malley, Michael. “Comfortably Numb with an Infected Humanity.” Taking Giant Steps, 31 

Oct. 2018, https://giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2018/10/comfortably-numb-with-infected-humanity.html

Orellana, Roger. “Why Not Suicide? Reflections on Wenders’ Wings of Desire.’” Taking Giant 

Steps, 30 Jan. 2019, https://giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2019/01/why-not-suicide-reflections-on-wenders.html 

Wings of Desire. Dir. Wim Wenders. Perf. Bruno Ganz, Otto Sander, Solveig Dommartin. Road

        Movies Film Production, 1987. 

Why Not Suicide? Reflections on Wenders’ Wings of Desire by Roger Orellana

Is humankind inherently bad? Even the most optimistic person cannot help but to build a melancholic attitude towards humankind, an almost tangible disappointment. Artists are exceptionally talented at evoking that question through art. Nicolas Roeg’s Walkabout conveys the idea that some people are forever doomed to miscommunicate, consequently devastating any parties involved. Lina Wertmuller’s Swept Away presents the tragedies that occur out of man’s incapability to love. What a shame, one must think, that this entire group which I belong to must be so destructive to itself. Jamie Uys’ The Gods Must Be Crazy, although it is executed as a light-hearted comedy, nevertheless conveys the sad truth of the monster that capitalist man becomes because of his implacable sense of ownership. No, no one must be blamed for being ashamed and severely disillusioned by what has become (and truly, what always has been) of humanity. After viewing humanity tearing itself apart in such monstrous ways, one is placed in the tricky position of hopelessness. Indeed, one may conclude, humanity is a base and filthy thing. But even such claims can be welcomed with cold skepticism. Wim Wenders’ Wings of Desire is the antithesis to this general disillusionment of humanity evoked by the previous films. Wings of Desire is a celebration of the condition of being alive anytime and anywhere.

Once the film is over, the credits commemorate the dead. Wenders dedicated Wings of Desire to three monumental film directors: Yasujiro Ozu, Francois Truffaut, and Andrei Tarkovsky (Wenders 2:04:44). Ozu is one of those directors who teaches how to grow past imperfections and whose excellence is seen through making the simplest of stories into incredible cinematic masterpieces that celebrate life. Roger Ebert, in his film review of Tokyo Story, accurately describes the director: “Ozu is not only a great director but a great teacher, and after you know his films, a friend,” (Ebert, par. 4). Among the aforementioned directors is the great Truffaut, one of the titans of the French New Wave. He went from being a juvenile delinquent to one of the greatest directors in film history. His The Four-Hundred Blows (1959) rescued me from a time of tormenting pessimism by showing me that, although life can be especially hard even for a child, there is always hope for the future. Tarkovsky is a director who influenced so many and yet he refused to be influenced by previous filmmakers. Despite that, his films offer an incredible layer of complexity to life. Tarkovsky’s filmography is not the most cheerful, but it is undeniably beautiful and the images he creates are unforgettable. Andrei Rublev (1966) is an incredible example of Tarkovsky’s views, celebrating art in times of darkness and death. Wenders’ direct influence by those directors indicates a great deal about where his philosophies are oriented. There is a specific pattern in the conclusions of the films of Ozu, Truffaut, and Tarkovsky: they are generally optimistic and demonstrate hope for the future, despite also providing images tough to swallow. Wings of Desire follows that pattern. Wenders demonstrates the darkness that lurks in man’s life but concludes by choosing life over anything. Wenders’ dedication of Wings of Desire to the aforementioned directors indicates that he wishes to continue their legacy of celebrating life through motion pictures.

Wenders also celebrates life through the character of Damiel, the protagonist of Wings of Desire, who is an immortal angel who spends his time on tall skyscrapers observing the unfortunate heirs of the desolation of WWII, the poor Berliners. Damiel has the great luxury of living out of time, out of pain and consequently, out of suffering. Many men would give anything to possess such extraordinary privileges. Moreover, it is also evident that man is bound to the pattern of avoiding suffering and increasing his own happiness. What could be better than not having to worry about suffering? Damiel, the angel, the elevated creature that lives out of time, decides to shed his unique gifts to transform into a human. This would seem like a reversed metamorphosis, the superior creature becoming a lower version of itself, mortal and vulnerable. But Wenders states the opposite by demonstrating that life is worth living, and that it is not irrevocably lost to suffering. After Damiel falls in love, he is filled with an enormous longing for the small things in life. He longs to live as a mortal creature despite witnessing all the chaos and pain of life, because love is such a fulfilling and beautiful feeling, and man can love but an angel cannot. The ability to love, then, becomes man’s greatest gift and most extraordinary faculty, inciting the envy of creatures that are surcease of emotion. Thus, Damiel sheds his immortality to become mortal, feeble, but loving. Wenders concludes Wings of Desire by stating that the ability to love is the greatest gift of mankind, and that as long as there is love, there is nothing better than being alive.

Wenders celebrates life by telling the audience to become proactive and live. Cassiel and Damiel preserve and maintain reality by watching over Berlin before it was even Berlin. They are spectators, voyeurs that observe humans and their struggles. Cassiel and Damiel mimic the viewer of the film. Leigh Singer of the British Film Institute notes that “Ultimately, Wings of Desire is a visionary film about vision: the act of watching, with all its fascinations and limitations,” (Singer, par. 4). The angels, just as the movie-goer, are fascinated in many ways by human conflict, but at the same time are unable to intervene or do anything about the people they come to care about. This is why Cassiel is forever tormented by the man whose suicide he could not prevent. Damiel, however, breaks out of his state of spectatorship to have a place on earth and becomes a human. Damiel becomes proactive and as a consequence he learns to be amazed by the small yet incredible pleasures of everyday life. This transformation into proactiveness is Wenders’ way of calling the audience to action. Essentially, no matter how good cinema and books and our cellphones are, there is a world of life out there, and all the small things are worth experiencing. In this way, Wings of Desire becomes a celebration of life and all the joy that the small things can bring.

It is not uncommon to be severely disillusioned by life. But one can find solace in the fact that people like Wenders can celebrate the good side of life through art, thus persuading us that life is indeed worth living. After being spiritually broken by Walkabout, Swept Away, and The Gods Must Be Crazy, Wings of Desire is like molten gold that joins all the pieces together. Indeed, there are many films that end in an optimistic note, but it is an empty optimism. Wings of Desire ends beautifully by demonstrating that it is man’s capacity to love that make life worth living. I can think of only a handful of films that depict ideas as honest and beautiful as that. Much more can be said in praise of the film that would only repeat what other critics have already said. But this film is undeniably a gift.

Works Cited

Ebert, Roger. “Tokyo Story Movie Review & Film Summary (1953) | Roger Ebert.”         RogerEbert.com, 9 Nov. 2003, www.rogerebert.com/reviews/great-movie-tokyo-story-             1953.

Singer, Leigh. “Five Visual Themes in Wings of Desire – Wim Wenders' Immortal Film about             Watching.” British Film Institute, www.bfi.org.uk/news-opinion/news-bfi/features/five-    visual-themes-wings-desire-immortal-film-about-watching.

Wings of Desire. Dir. Wim Wenders. Perf. Bruno Ganz, Otto Sander. MGM, 1987. Film.

Build Roads, Don't Just Drive on Them by Victoria Wetmore

Life is a crazy thing. I am not here to preach that living is some magical journey that changes the foundation of society as we know it, but people should take advantage of the life that they have been given. To have the ability to run through valleys, feel the wind in our hair, and breathe the air around us is amazing. The sad part of these hidden blessings is that we are all merely a blip in the existence of the world, yet we are expected to make the most of life. However, if life is so small, then what is the point? What are we here for if, in the relativity of time and space, we are only here for a few seconds? Why are humans expected to make a difference, to be somebody, and to carve our own paths for others to be inspired by? It is because we matter. Our few seconds on Earth make a difference to those who follow simply because we are all connected to one another.

           

In Peter Handke’s poem, “Song of Childhood,” written specifically for Wim Wenders’ 1987 drama/fantasy Wings of Desire, he writes, “...everything is soulful, / and all souls are one” (8-9). Our choices have meaning to those who succeed us; we continue on our journeys laced with the ideas of the ancestors rooted in our heritage, lineage and nation. Even so, the insights and discoveries of our predecessors do not determine how we should act, but they influence the choices that we make today. People are constantly out to be their best, to cope effectively with their existence and to advance human civilization. Hence, there is a constant inner battle with ourselves to be adaptable and to find the ability to make choices that are not stereotypical, biased or pre-determined. 

Personally, I am guilty of competing with others. I grew up believing that if I were not on top, then I was not the best; then again, I often did not show how smart I was to others because that would be showing too much of my hand. I also strived to not deviate from the path that our stereotyped society has created for me. I continued to do the same thing every single day—not because it was habitual but because I was scared to have my homeostasis rocked. In this sense, the character known as The Girl in Nicolas Roeg’s Walkabout is a parallel to a younger me. She did not want to go along with the Aborigine and break the cultural barriers of western civilization in the Australian Outback. The white, British, teenaged foreigner could not accept the advances of the indigenous teenager on his walkabout, nor learn his ways of life simply because they differed from her pre-chosen course. To cope with her decision to remain stagnant in a culture that constrained her, especially when her husband disappointed her, she daydreamed of the freedom that she experienced (Roeg, 1:38:03). 

Her swimming naked in the lake waters in the Outback (Roeg, 0:58:09) symbolizes her inner need to undress from a life that forced her to escape her mad and suicidal father, watch over her younger brother and become a boring housewife. The subconscious voice of the British girl yearned for the independence that her conscious mind could not even begin to understand nor allow. What she was seeking was a mind and life of her own, but she was too brainwashed by thoughts drilled into her of how she should run her life. She, as well as I, should learn to “join with the consciousness of others, not compete with it” (Gordon). 

Afraid to adapt to change, I often fall prey to these inner battles over the smallest of decisions. I do not skip class, but usually contemplate it to the point of having a headache. I do not have the ability to say no to even the simplest of requests because it is in my conditioning to be nice, even if I am swamped with work. I cannot join my friends in these basic teenage activities because I refuse to change my ways. For example, I never argue with my parents’ decisions when receiving a firm no after asking to stay out late with my friends. Usually, I am frightened by the consequences that would come from the potential fight, but in my mind what they say goes.  When I wish for a better way to grasp what is thrown at me, I go to my oasis, my waterhole, where I can swim freely. This metaphorical lake is the television. My favorite programs calm me down and allow me briefly to live a different life. If I picture myself in the shows, then I am not in reality. Despite this, as we all know, The Girl and I have not found a way out; we have simply developed coping mechanisms to blind us from the harsh reality that we refuse to change. 

           

However, there are ways to push past these “fixed” boundaries. Our “writing coach and midwife,” Paul Kirpal Gordon, suggests we create and develop three interconnected and interdependent experiences that check and balance each other. The first is a healthy love relationship with a significant other. If we are all supposed to be one collective soul, then we require healthy, quality human exchanges that help us sustain a love life and vital connection with the person we care most deeply about. To have someone to come back to at the end of the day who cares about you just as much as you care about them is one of the most beneficial things that the human mind, body and soul can have. Studies show, “From childhood until old age, being connected to others in secure and loving relationships helps our patients better deal with stress” (Vallas, par. 7). The second part of this model is to develop a dependable and inspiring core of friends, family and associates who one can trust with one’s deepest issues, fears and ambitions. Having peers to talk to or a supporting family life helps to keep a clear and focused mind and heart. Thirdly, one must discover on one’s own walkabout what one wants to do with one’s life in terms of a meaningful career, vocation and service to others. The Girl thought that she had to follow the predetermined path of compliant schoolgirl, responsible older sister, snobbish foreigner and obedient wife in the overbearing land of stereotypes and comfort, but she really wanted to break free of the chains of civilized man. The longing look of regret in her eyes at the end of the film (Roeg, 1:38:18) portrays her lack of independence and her yearning to return to the freedom that the Outback allowed. 

I want to establish my own path in advertising and become somebody who I can love and respect, not some plastic doll that my parents can dress into whatever career they think will earn me the most money. 

           

When I and The Girl escape to our imaginative states, we miss out on what reality presents to us, especially the people, things and events that can enlarge our perspectives on life. Coming into college, I had to learn to re-train my senses in order to experience Hofstra University because it is anything but a typical college. Here, there is the inclusion of all races, genders and backgrounds, as well as clubs and support groups that welcome us with open arms. In my town of Brick, New Jersey, such an impartial and non-judgmental community does not exist. Hofstra’s diverse and international community of individuals feels like several indigenous societies brought together into one spot, which has allowed me to immerse myself in an environment of change. It is not a place where I can pretend to be someone else for a little while; it is an environment that is molding me into who I really want to be: a decisive, determined, contributing part of a collective society. 

In order to make my engagement into a true community happen, I have to drop my old ideas about status and labels and categories that do not allow me to explore all the possibilities thrown my way. Lina Wertmuller’s controversial Swept Away helped with this part of my journey. Her two main Italian protagonists, Raffaella and Gennarino, become stranded on a deserted island together. In such a circumstance, one would think that differences would be set aside as survival becomes the imperative mindset of both castaways. Instead, Raffaella could not drop her upper-class ego to allow the lower-class ruffian Gennarino to help her. Her mistreatment of his help on the yacht fueled the fire that metaphorically burned the bridge for a true connection. Both protagonists allowed their social status and political views to constrict their lives on the island. They had the potential to break the norm and join together to construct a love relationship or mutual friendship, sans any previous connections of wealth and class. Nonetheless, trouble emerges when Gennarino starts bullying Raffaella who soon succumbs to Stockholm Syndrome. As described in Ariana Farajollah’s blog post, “An Abused Woman’s Colonization and Declaration of Independence in Swept Away,” “Mental disorder therapist Julia Layton describes the cause of the syndrome: ‘In a traumatic and extraordinarily stressful event, a person finds herself held captive by a man who is threatening to kill her if she disobeys him in any way. She may be abused — physically, sexually and/or verbally — and have trouble thinking straight’” (Farajollah, par. 2). Simply put, the two protagonists tricked themselves into believing that they had a true connection while on the island. However, when they return to the mainland, the stigma of class and status reappear, and they revert back to their own ways. Raffaella ditches Gennarino for her upper-class husband and his wealth. 

   

The idea that status controls us and inhibit who we can be with is preposterous but tragic. It cuts off the idea that we are all one and of the same place. This persisting issue of ranking falls in line with my own personal problem: I did not want to set aside my intentions of being on top. Nevertheless, if I were to stick to this framework, I would constantly be on this high horse that made me believe that I was better than the people around me. Consequently, entertaining this delusional state of mind would only be limiting my own growth and interpretation of the world. Since entering college, my antennae has allowed me to reach those in need of not only academic help but social assistance, too. I no longer attempt to be the best; instead, I use my tools to benefit others around me. Hence, I am more open to share my thoughts and ideas that used to be secretive. I use my school work to benefit others and to try new things that a younger, hesitant me could not think of doing. I dropped my own stereotypes and have since benefitted morally from the change.

I realized that to enhance my intellectual and moral growth I need to stop ignoring topics I do not fully comprehend. In fact, an obtuse, head-in-the-sand lifestyle can create these differences that further the disconnect gap that I am struggling to close. In order to become a better and more well-rounded individual, I am learning things that help me to better comprehend a larger world, not just things that relate to my public relations major. For example, I am all for mathematics, but I draw the line just at extreme problems that require four sheets of paper to complete. Similarly, I enjoy debating on politics, but I have no control over what the country or the world does, nor do I feel like my ideas fit directly into one political party.     

What I have learned is that every single person has the right to enjoy things that I do not. After all, my ability to accept those differences and participate in life with those who have contrasting ideas from me is what makes us all one. The concept that we can all be connected, no matter our personal beliefs, is something stronger than we are able to perceive. Jamie Uys portrayed this mindset in The Gods Must Be Crazy, in which an indigenous bushman of the Kalahari Desert, Xi, came across a Coke bottle. The piece of glass that was once seen as useful to the tribe was actually the catalyst that created the dispute in the community and eventually drew them apart. Although I agree with removing toxic things from our lives, I do not agree with Xi’s decision to travel to the end of the earth to rid his band of people from this new item. He did not like the disagreement that the bottle caused within the tribe, even though it was a tool that helped to roll out animal skins, make music, and other various tasks. Instead of attempting to regulate the use of the bottle or understand more about it, he threw it away. I tend to handle my problems with information that I do not care about nor comprehend the same way. The bushmen and I should learn how to open ourselves to appreciating the differences between those with thoughts that differ from our original ideologies. Just because we are from different places does not mean that we should be blind to the way others function; “spiritually we are one,” (Enea) but “we are different people who form part of a bigger group called mankind, which makes us one” (Orellana). I have begun to grow as a person by listening to ideas different than my own, and I associate myself with people I originally would have put off after the first meeting. I have gained a new set of eyes. After watching Uys’ film, I connected more profoundly with the idea that we are all one. Rather than seeing ourselves as animals in competition with one another, we are cooperative beings who share the same prerogative to experience the best lives that we can.

In a world where there is so much miscommunication and discrepancy, an imaginary force holds us back. We are closed off because we are blocking out the peripheral vision sensors that we are born with, which prohibits us from seeing the small things and appreciating what is right in front of us. It also lessens our desire to be content with what we have because we always have to be on top with the next best gadget. Although we have the freedom of choice to do what we want, when we want, and with whomever we choose, Walkabout, Swept Away and The Gods Must Be Crazy all portray what happens when we do not break the stereotypes that limit us, when we pretend to be something we are not and when we fail to adapt to change. In Wim Wenders’ Wings of Desire, angel Damiel drops these notions when he falls in love with a mortal. In what world would an angel be able to follow their heart to take human form in order to be with their mortal lover? Most people watching the film would say, “Never,” but that is because we are so blocked by pre-determined characteristics and the illusion that things are magically set in stone. Well, stones break and crumble. Damiel chooses to give up angelic immortality to know what it is like to love and experience the world first hand. As fellow “fallen” angel Peter Falk advises him, Damiel comes to appreciate the small things, like drinking coffee, bleeding, seeing color and tasting food. He celebrates hope. Fellow writer and Hofstra student blogger Monica Boretsky noted in “Wim Wenders’ Wings of Desire: A Reason to Believe,” “Damiel has a visible reaction of joy and contentment. His face eases up and clearly experiences the full sensation that many people have overlooked” (par. 2). Damiel broke out of the mold in order to join life instead of standing outside of it. We do not always understand that we have the ability to control our own fates. 

 

I have recently been immersed in an environment that has caused me to follow my career ambition and become the best person that I can possibly be, inside and out. I can make choices that benefit me, no matter the original preconceptions that I once had. For example, just because I am straight does not mean that I cannot have LGBTQ+ friends or learn from their experiences; I am female, but that does not mean I have to stay in the kitchen and cook for a man or stay out of the billiards room at Hofstra because the other pool players are male (see “The Art of the Real Hustle,” February 12, 2018, Taking Giant Steps Press Blog). Who says I have to remain quiet and timid when I was born with my own mouth to speak freely about feminism and equal rights? My own mind allows me to conjure up my own opinions and formulate my own lifestyle that transcends any and all stereotypes. Attending Hofstra University has done wonders for my growth and for expanding my mindset to a whole new level. I want to be myself! “Why lie and cheat when you have the confidence to be yourself?” (Gordon). I am tired of trying to be someone that I am not just to please the people around me. I am sick of the assumptions that make people believe they must be different or better than everyone else. Breaking those boundaries has expanded my comfort zone. In an attempt to network properly and get ahead for the years to come, I have found myself growing closer to students in my major. I am the person in charge of determining what happens with my life. 

I struggled to make friends when I first entered the university. I wandered around campus and introduced myself to the folks at the ultimate frisbee table. They made me feel accepted. When I attended their scrimmage, I was immersed in kindness and felt a communion with all of their wild spirits. I did not feel the need to be different or change who I was in order to be accepted. In this moment, I also realized that this is a group of people who do not judge anybody. They also played together as seven cogs in one cohesive machine, as opposed to seven individuals on a field. This type of comradery is what proved to me that this was the form of society that I needed to be a part of in order to thrive. 

In an attempt to get to my goal of being in advertising faster, I joined the Public Relations Student Society of America (PRSSA). I wanted to get a head start. I learned that I have to make my own path in order to get to where I want, not expect things to just fall in my lap. If I want to make it in this field, I must learn to work together with people, for being part of a team and acting as one is an important skill to have in this work setting. Damiel’s tenacity is exactly what I need to develop in order to stay strong in the business field. Handke’s message that we are all one is what reels me back if I lose the teamwork model. My seventh-grade teacher, a man who taught me more about myself at the age of twelve than I have learned in my other eighteen years of existence, presented me with this quote: “Learning is not attained by chance; it must be sought for with ardor and attended to with diligence” (Founding Families). Abigail Adams wrote this to her son, John Quincy Adams, telling him that wandering is not the way to traverse through life. He has to be focused and know what he wants (which relates back to the three ideas for love-friends-career). Wenders takes this idea and flips it on its head, for it shows the journey of an angel, of a spirit, searching for something that transforms him. Damiel is on the hunt for love, for feeling, for something real; he is done with the business of watching and witnessing. Peter Handke’s idea that “all souls are one” influences Damiel’s decisions, for he does not let the fact that he is an angel stop him from loving a mortal and incarnating that dream. 

I am still learning to not let the preconceived notions of society weigh me down and make me feel trapped and unable to make my own choices. I have been on this journey for a long time and do not expect to stop when times get tough. Even though we are “of the same root but different flowers” (Gordon), we are soulfully one and have to remember that, under the umbrella of gender, sex, color, race, creed or religion, the sun shines equally on us all. Before college, I was in a town that was set in its old ways. After entering Hofstra University, I have been welcomed by individuals who see the world as a place to interpret thoughts and ideas for ourselves, rather than following a map that has already been written out. Perhaps it is better to deviate from those pre-written directions once in a while. I mean, what is a true adventure without getting lost a bit? While a good majority of rules should be followed, it is not up to our old stereotypes and predisposed information to determine our destinies. Instead, I am learning to figure things out for myself. I have even found joy in activities like writing and arts and crafts that I never found excitement in before college. These new experiences allow us to be unique and individualistic, but it is the same idea that we all want to be ourselves that make us all one. I am happy to report that I am going in the right direction and have Hofstra University and all of the people that I have met thus far to thank for it. 

Works Cited

Boretsky, Monica. “Wim Wenders' Wings of Desire: A Reason to Believe,” 

1Jan. 1970,giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2017/06/wim-wenders-wings-of-desire-reason-to.html

Enea, Kristen. Class Discussion. 18 Apr. 2018.

Farajollah, Ariana. Taking Giant Steps. "An Abused Woman's Colonization and Declaration of 

            Independence in Swept Away," 1 Jan. 1970, 

            giantstepspress.blogspot.com/2017/06/an-abused-womans-colonization-and.html.

Founding Families: Digital Editions of the Papers of the Winthrops and the Adamses, ed.C. 

James Taylor. Boston: Massachusetts Historical Society, 2018.

            http://www.masshist.org/apde2/

.

Gordon, Paul Kirpal. Class Discussion. 18 Apr. 2018.

Orellana, Roger. Class Discussion. 18 Apr. 2018.

“The Positive Effects of Love on Mental Health.” Psychiatry Advisor, 11 Mar. 2016, 

            www.psychiatryadvisor.com/mood-disorders/the-positive-effects-of-love-on-mental-healt

            h/article/401655/.

Roeg, Nicolas. Walkabout. Perf. Jenny Agutter, David Gulpilil, and Luc Roeg. Twentieth 

Century Fox, 1971. Film.